


a quiet place

by foreverstudent



Series: we two, begin (again) [1]
Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ
Genre: Analog Trip, Gen, Homin - Freeform, Super Juniors mentioned, short oneshot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:28:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24141337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foreverstudent/pseuds/foreverstudent
Summary: The night at the hotel after Yunho’s panic attack in the water cave. Yunho wants to be braver, but Changmin just wants to sleep.Set during Analog Trip.
Relationships: Jung Yunho & Shim Changmin, Jung Yunho/Shim Changmin
Series: we two, begin (again) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1748920
Comments: 4
Kudos: 75





	a quiet place

Yunho wakes up in the middle of night, breathing heavily as he sits up in bed. The walls seem to be closing in around him, and he suddenly feels claustrophobic in the hotel room that he and Changmin share. His eyes adjust to the darkness of the room and he spares a glance for Changmin sleeping soundly on the second bed, turned away from Yunho. 

Exhaling, Yunho tries to get himself under control as the day’s events flash through his mind, the momentary panic of the cave threatening to overwhelm his senses again. The blankets seem to entangle him, hold him down, pull him under, and he kicks them off swiftly, pulling up his knees as he forces himself to take deep breaths. 

“Breathe, Jung,” he mutters to himself under his breath, frustrated as his lungs won’t obey his commands to expand, to take in the oxygen that he desperately needs. 

Stumbling out of bed, he slides open the door to the small hotel room balcony, stepping outside and closing the door behind him, careful not to wake Changmin. He leans on the banister and looks out, taking in first the hotel’s swimming pool beneath and the dim lights of the town beyond. He breathes, relishing the warmth and humidity of Yogyakarta air, so different from Seoul. Slowly, slowly, he feels his heart rate relax, leaning more and more on the banister as his muscles and bones release the tension that had been built up during the tiring day. 

“Hyung?” a sleepy voice calls gently behind him, and Yunho whips around to find a confused and drowsy Changmin, barefoot and in shorts and a t-shirt, rubbing his eyes as he pushes the sliding door open and steps into the balcony. For a moment, Yunho flashes back more than a decade, to the cramped dorm rooms and the younger pajama-clad Changmin with sleepy innocent eyes, desperately trying to find a place to sleep in the middle of his older brothers. 

He blinks, and the Changmin of today replaces his vision, a whole two centimeters taller than his hyung, handsome and intelligent with the voice of a god, and the only member he has left — his other half on a stage so wide it threatens to swallow him whole. Despite the vestiges of fear and panic on the edge of his mind, Yunho can’t help but smile fondly at his younger brother, his maknae, still adorable to him after all these years. “Changmin,” Yunho says apologetically. “Did I wake you?”

The younger just shakes his head, yawning. “No, I couldn’t sleep either.”

That’s a lie, and maybe they both know it. In truth, Changmin was deeply asleep, exhausted by the day’s activities. The creaking of the balcony door had woken him, and he came fully awake when he saw the empty bed beside him, Yunho gone. In truth, Changmin knew something had been bothering his hyung since the cave, since the van ride where he was quieter than usual, since the afternoon when he subtly avoided the cameras that had been filming them all day, turning away his face. _For the first time in sixteen years, Yunho-hyung went first._

But he fakes drowsiness anyway, covering up his worry by rubbing his eyes and yawning for good measure, because if there’s anything he knows about Yunho, it’s that his hyung has his pride. And if there’s anything Yunho knows about Changmin, it’s that he is considerate of his hyung to a fault. And so Yunho accepts the lie, with gratefulness — because he knows that this is Changmin’s way of saying _hyung, what do you need? I’m here._

“Sorry,” Yunho offers, but Changmin just shrugs and goes to stand beside his hyung, the two of them looking out over Yogyakarta. The cameras are gone for the day, there are no fans to perform for, Super Junior are all asleep — it’s just them, the way it’s always been.

The two of them lean on the banister and just breathe, Yunho acutely aware of the way Changmin is timing his breathing, deep and even, providing a guide for his hyung to follow. And he does, willing his lungs to expand, taking in the air, the two of them inhaling and exhaling until they have reached a perfect rhythm, as though their balcony is a stage and they match each other step for step. 

A few minutes pass, the stars in the night sky mirroring the town lights as the two stand together in silence. “Thanks,” Yunho says finally, his eyes looking down, clasping his hands together nervously. He doesn’t look at Changmin, but he can feel the maknae’s curious eyes on him, Changmin’s head turned toward his hyung. 

To his credit, Changmin finishes his examination, looking over his leader from head to toe, and just nods knowingly, looking straight ahead. “Was it the cave?” Changmin asks gently, and Yunho flinches at how his maknae has just read him so accurately, as though he were an open book. But then — he should be used to this by now. 

Beside him, Changmin just sighs and leans on Yunho, his head finding its place on his hyung’s shoulder. Yunho stiffens at first, startled, but he eventually relaxes. This is familiar — this is every van ride post-concert, this was their dorm nights, this is still _them,_ many many years later: this is how it ought to be. 

And Changmin knows, knows that Jung Yunho draws stability from being relied on, from being the leader, from being useful. He is not particularly inclined to physical affection, not like his Super Junior friends, but he knows how to ground his hyung, how to keep him in place when life gets overwhelming. Yunho would never deny Changmin his shoulder to lean on. 

“It’s okay, hyung,” Changmin continues, not really knowing if his stubborn leader is listening, but figuring he should try anyway. “You’re allowed to be afraid.”

Yunho just stands there, the comforting weight of Changmin’s head on his shoulder and his heavy words on his heart. “I have to be better, Changmin-ah,” he whispers. “I have to learn to be braver.” Because it was just darkness and cold, and his fear was irrational. It was something he could beat, something he could just push out of the way the same way he did every other obstacle in life. It was frustrating to have something as little as this sink its way into his head, keep him awake, leave fear in his mind.

“Next time, tell me,” Changmin says, fighting to get his thoughts out before he really falls asleep, because his hyung’s shoulder is more comfortable than it ought to be, even with the two of them standing up, and the warm air wraps around them like an embrace. “I’ll walk with you.”

And Yunho knows it’s very literal, as in Changmin would walk with him through the dark cave again if it ever came to that, but his mind can’t help but connect the phrase with the last decade, and it sounds more like the echo of a promise, proven many times over. 

“Changmin-ah…” Yunho starts, struggling to speak through the sudden lump in his throat, ready to offer up a protest, a disclaimer that his maknae doesn’t need to do that, that he’s done it already so many times, too many times to count, too many more times than he should have — but all protests die in his throat as Changmin’s head gets heavier, lolling until it reaches Yunho’s chest, and Yunho realizes that his maknae has truly fallen asleep.

In truth, Changmin is still slightly awake, and he knows the protests that will come next, his leader’s admonishment that he does not need to do that, that he has done it too many times to count, much more than is necessary — but Changmin does not want to hear it. So he shuts up his hyung by deploying his ultimate weapon — falling asleep. 

And Yunho is amused, but he knows this is Changmin’s answer. He knows that his younger brother will fend off all his protests, and insist — bravely, foolishly, wholeheartedly — on following his leader through any dark caves, literal or metaphorical. And maybe secretly, Jung Yunho is deeply, deeply grateful, even if he does not understand why. “ _Arasseo,_ ” Yunho says, giving up. “Let’s go back to sleep, Changdola.”

Smiling fondly at the younger man now effectively leaning his whole body against his hyung, Yunho maneuvers until he has an arm around Changmin’s waist and Changmin’s arm around his neck, pulling the taller man along as he opens the sliding door and steps back into their room, closing the door behind them. 

Taking a few steps, Yunho is surprised when Changmin’s body moves on its own and his maknae flings himself down on Yunho’s bed, the closest one to the balcony door. “Yah, that’s mine, Changdola,” Yunho chuckles, the panic and fear in his heart forgotten. “Move,” he says gently, nudging the younger. 

Changmin pays him no heed, because even in his half-asleep state, the maknae knows that there’s no way his hyung is going to get some sleep tonight — unless he forces him to. Instead, Changmin turns in the bed and pulls his hyung down with him, Yunho landing beside him with a grunt. Still under the guise of sleepiness, Changmin kicks around the blankets until there is space for the two grown men on the small bed. 

“You’re a little too big for sleepovers, Changmin-ah,” Yunho says wryly, moving in bed until he finds a position comfortable enough for the two of them. Finally, Yunho ends up flat on his back, Changmin curled up against him with his head on Yunho’s shoulder. Yunho’s arm is about to grow numb, but he doesn’t dare move. Even after all these years and with the extra centimeters, Changmin has always managed to make himself smaller, Yunho’s arm big enough to hold him close. 

“Go to sleep, hyung,” Changmin whines, trying to make his voice as drowsy as he possibly can. In truth, he is listening to his hyung’s heartbeat, hearing him breath, hoping for calm. 

“Okay, Changmin-ah, okay,” his hyung’s amused voice replies, and Changmin can feel his leader’s fingers brushing through his hair as both of their breathing slows. 

This time, Changmin can really feel himself falling asleep. He sneaks one last peek at his hyung’s face, happy to see him relaxed and resting, finally claimed by peaceful sleep. 

Relieved, Changmin curls in closer, pulling the blanket up over both of them as the airconditioner chills the room. “Good night, hyung,” Changmin whispers, settling in for a night of chasing away his hyung’s nightmares, before sleep takes him too. 

**Author's Note:**

> love Homin <3


End file.
